When my son was born more than 14 years ago I never imagined that his hair would be a big deal. I mean most boys keep their hair short and use minimal hair products — not mine.
Cole is a throwback to the 1960s. He likes the Beatles, Jimi Hendrix, The Doors, Rolling Stones and Cream and yes his hair is long. For the past several years he’s been growing it out and until Monday he didn’t have his hair cut in six months.
He is particular about his locks too — I mean that’s a girl thing, but he’s been blessed with thick natural curly hair. Like everyone I know — including me who has natural curls — he hates it. Oh, I have learned to live with my curls through the years, however for a boy it can be horrendous, especially in middle school.
Well this past weekend he went to a friends house and she used a flat iron to straighten his hair. He already does this with a blowdryer, but he liked the way the straightening element worked much better so I took him to get his hair trimmed and bought him a new piece of styling equipment and some hair products.
After getting his hair cut he came home, washed, dryed and had me fix his “do” before bed. He says it saves him time in the morning. It’s odd doing my son’s hair, but I don’t mind. He wants it to look good and so do I.
Lately there are people that have commented to me about his “shaggy style” and then question why I would allow it. OK let’s set the record straight I realized a long time ago I never wanted his hair or clothing choices to be a battle. I remember what it was like as a teenager when people commented about my style choices — I didn’t like it.
Long hair on boys is often seen as symbol of rebellion against the cultural norm. It signals a separation from structures and rules.
The naysayers often say boys with long hair grow up to be irresponsible, carefree, wanderers, who don’t know how to hold down a regular job. They are easily influenced by the wrong crowd and will be disadvataged in “adult” America.
I believe it’s not the hair that makes the difference, it’s the upbringing. It’s what you expect from your kid, and what he is expsed to. Hair has nothing to do with personal responsibility or success. So I will continue to support my son no matter what length he decides to keep — after all it’s his hair.